Similar to the calendar, we humans cycle through different seasons in our lives.
A new season represents transition and change.
There are always pros and cons involved with change. The sunshine and lazy days of summer also come with mosquitos and excessive heat - well that’s the case in Houston anyway.
And even though the winter might involve skiing and snowmen, it can also be dreary, gray and depressing.
The same is true for new parenting seasons as well. Babyhood involves so many honeymoon moments. AND it’s also known as baby boot-camp because it’s freaking exhausting!
There's a reason sleep deprivation is used to torture prisoners of war. Legit!
Many of us excitedly anticipate our babies entering the toddler season. Finally a full night of sleep.
And similar to the mosquitos of summer, toddlers are picky eaters who whine and have frequent meltdowns.
So how do we embrace the new parenting season’s mosquitoes and heat?
I believe that most of our parenting challenges - bedtime battles, morning mayhem, power struggles and picky eating, can usually be linked to entering a new parenting season without a realistic plan.
Just like you wouldn’t head to the beach in Galveston during the month of July without loads of sunscreen and mosquito repellent, (can you tell how much I hate mosquitoes), what’s your plan as you enter your new season with your kiddos?
And even though we didn’t wear sunscreen in the 70’s and 80’s or use bug repellent, those things are now the norm.
If your kids ignore your simple requests, it might be time to evaluate your communication methods. If it feels like your people don’t seem to listen until voices are raised and tempers flare, it’s because the outdated model for raising kids is not effective in this new season upon us.
Our world is very different. It's a new season.
Let’s say you decide to wear your winter clothes in May because you grew up in Chicago and May in Illinois is still sweater weather.
Well now that you live in Texas, that beautiful cashmere sweater feels like pure sweaty misery if you wear it in May.
The seasons are very different in these two states.
Well the same is true for raising kids during the 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, 90’s and even the 2000’s.
The parenting wardrobe that was perfectly comfortable during those seasons are producing miserable results in your current seasonal environment.
The old parenting conversation, the way most of us were raised, was designed for a different season. It was simply the way things were done back when.
The history of the old parenting model is rooted in a world where the objective was to raise compliant factory workers...be obedient, listen to authority and keep your mouth shut so you will grow up and have job security.
I have yet to meet a parent that dreams of their kid growing up to live a life wearing baby blue zip up jumpsuits and punching a time clock. No, no. We are raising innovators, thought leaders and problem solvers.
The old parenting conversation involved threats, rewards, punishment and bribes because that season for parenting in our country was preparing our kids for a simpler season.
A simpler world.
This new season involves a “new parenting conversation” where you’ll experience cooperation without aggression.
Have you ever worried that your harsh words are accidentally extinguishing your kid’s bright light?
This new productive parenting convo feels better for a reason. It involves empathy, teamwork and rich connection.
This is what will support the innovative thought leaders that our kids will grow up to be in our future season.
The new parenting conversation is fresh, friendly and progressive for the season of growth and innovation we live in right now. The future season is bright.
Embracing this new season for raising kids is the equivalent to being the change you wish to see in the world.
ABOUT RANDI RUBENSTEIN
Randi helps parents, particularly ones with a strong willed kiddo, learn tools to raise confident, kind, and self motivated kids by improving the conversations in your family.
As the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast and author of The Parent Gap, Randi helps parents keep cool and replace old patterns. Randi’s parenting motto is, “When our thoughts grow, the convos in our home flow".
To learn more go to www.randirubenstein.com.